Ipso Facto
by BloodMoonNights
Summary: I don't like guys," Kenny said. I felt emabrassed. I nodded and left.
1. Chapter I

Ipso Facto

KYLE'S POV

X

He answered the door in his pajamas. They had little sheep on them, and they were far too long and hung past his hands and feet. He rubbed his eyes sleepily and invited me in. We walked in silence to his room and he fell back onto his bed once we had shut the door. The house creaked as the wind whistled past his window. It was cold, and I had forgotten my jacket.

"C-can I put on your hoody?" I asked, rubbing my arms. He nodded and gave a muffled 'yes' into his pillow. I slipped on his orange hoody, and absorbed myself in the smell: smoke and spice. Interesting enough. But, then again, this was Kenny.

He rolled over so that he could see me and gave a loud, long yawn. "So, what can I help you with Kylie-poo?" he asked. I bit my lip nervously.

Kenny's tousled and dirty blonde hair spilt over his face and he gingerly brushed it away. "I love you." I blurted and instantly wanted to just curl up and die. Kenny's eyes widened and he rubbed them warily. Sitting up, he put is feet on the grimy carpet.

"Excuse me?"

Could I say it again? "I love you! Kenny… I love you." I felt so weak now, like, a burden was lifted on my chest and I had to recover. But, I wasn't sure I'd ever recover from this little midnight admission. Kenny sat on his bed, and drummed his fingers on the edge of his messy bed. Occasionally he would bite his lip.

Finally he broke the silence, just as I was rising to leave. "I don't like guys, Kyle."

I nodded with my back to him, my fingers gripping the door panel in rage. Rage at myself for being stupid, rage at Kenny for being so factual and annoyingly amazing… Pure teenage angst.

"I know."

X

The alarm rings at seven. I shut it off and groan as I roll onto my back to stare at my ceiling. My hair is jutting out from all corners and I know it's going to take me a long time to fix it. After a long moment of silence, I rise from my bed and put on my clothes: Maroon polo top and baggy but still well fitting blue jeans. Put on my converse, and fix my glasses on my nose. Take a deep breath, look at myself in the mirror. I brush my fire red hair until it's fixed.

"Nice," I comment and finish my morning routine. As I come down the stairs I smell the aroma of mom's breakfast. My mouth waters. "Hello mother!" I call and enter the kitchen. Ike is already eating toast and sausage. He's stuffing his face to be precise. I glare, "Ike, stop being such a pig. Leave me something!" Mom puts more food on the table.

"Darling stop being rude!" she 'tsks'. I take a heaving breath and put some toast in my gob. It's burnt, but I eat it anyways. If I didn't mother would complain I was wasteful. She's that kind of liberal, gung-ho, save-the-whales kind of lady. You learn to live with it.

Check the clock.

It's eight o three. I grab my backpack and rush out the door. "Bye mother!" It had snowed last night after I'd gotten home. I trudge through new snow and make my shoe prints. It's a nice day, cool and somber. The wind picks up slightly and I can see my breath. "Huh," I say to myself.

Digging into my backpack I find my MP3 and turn it on. While I'm walking to school I might as well not be bored. Turn it to Moldy Peaches, 'Anyone Else but You' and look down at the snow.

Why did I have to say that to Kenny? I was stupid, and it's probably going to ruin our friendship. What did I expect though? Did I really expect Kenny to leap up and scream, "I LOVE YOU TOO!" Actually, yes I did a little. And, looking back on it, it was stupid and I regret it.

I reach the school and pack away my music. I lick my lips. They're chapped, and I groan. The bell rings and I rush in. The school is small, easy to locate, easy to maneuver around. Everyone is pretty much in the same class, with the same classmates since grade school. I know Kenny is in every one of my classes, and always within note-passing range.

My mind wanders from Kenny as I realize I'm about to be late to History. I make it just in time and take my seat in the second row, three seats from the front. Kenny is beside me, twiddling his pencil and whistling. He turns. My face goes crimson. He grins.

I try to work a smile on my face. He licks his lips and begins scrawling on the paper below him. I watch him, fascinated. Kenny is amazing. Tall, lean, with pale perfect and blemish free skin. His body is long and lean, muscular but not overbearingly. He's…. a God at our school.

I'm awoken from my daze as he hands me a piece of paper before our teacher captures out attention again. I open it with shaking hands. My throat is dry and my hands shake fiercely. "Kylie-poo. Meet me in the library at lunch?" Signed, Kenny-la." I look at him fleetingly.

He has a grin on his lips. My heart is racing, and I'm beginning to have trouble breathing. What could this mean? Oh, let me tell you something: Kenny always hooks up with his… dates in the library. Is this what I think it is?

I put my head on my desk and scribble notes, never really paying attention because it's incredibly hard to pay attention with a blonde haired God next to you.

X

TBC. Little Prologue. KennyKyle. Won't be very long, but the chapters, I'm anticipating, will be lengthy! Let me know who you like it. Thank you.


	2. Chapter II

Ipso Facto

KYLE'S POV

X

Previously: What could this mean? Oh, let me tell you something: Kenny always hooks up with his… dates in the library. Is this what I think it is? I put my head on my desk and scribble notes, never really paying attention because it's incredibly hard to pay attention with a blonde haired God next to you.

When the bell rang Kenny was gone before I could even fathom talking to him. I gathered my belongings and walked slowly with heavy feet to my next class. Hopefully then I would be able to talk to Kenny. Sure enough, as I entered the class, he was sitting in his desk, and upon my desk was a neatly folded note.

I leapt at it hungrily.

"Kyle, you will meet me won't you?" It read. I put it down and just stared at it. Kenny leaned over and put his lips on my ears. I jumped and couldn't breathe, I found. "You will, right?" his breath grazed my ears and it wafted into my nose. It smelt like smoke. It was intoxicating.

"Y-yes," I replied. Kenny smiled and leaned back, shutting his eyes. I tried very hard to turn my attention back to the teacher. Once more, it was hard to listen when Kenny was so close. Everything in my mind kept flying everywhere. What did Kenny want? What would he expect? What should I expect? My heart beat faster still.

"Class dismissed." the teacher said, and everyone rushed out. I sat still and watched Kenny saunter out. My face flushed. I slowly, and I mean snails pace slow, made my way to the large library of the high school. I gave a nervous glance as I peered around before going in and seeing Kenny's tousled hair climbing to the second floor. My feet sprinted and I saw him turn left. I followed, never seeing his face, but only the tips of his golden hair.

Finally I found him sitting n the floor, near a bookcase by the window that overlooked out school below. He smiled as I appeared. My knees shook, even though I ordered them to stop. "Hey, Kyle," Kenny said cheerfully, motioning for me to come forward. I obeyed, tentatively; I felt as if I was in quicksand.

"H-hey." I whispered.

"Why're you being such a sissy? Come here." he ordered, now stern and demanding. My face went beat red, and I sat down next to him. "Listen, about last night-" I cut him off before he could say anything else.

"D-don't worry. I was just being silly. Th-there was no way you'd ever be infatuated with me, I mean." I was close to ranting, but Kenny had leaned forward, pushing me back against the bookcases. He suddenly, and incredibly roughly, pressed his mouth onto mine. My body locked up.

My heart about burst.

If this is a game, I wanted to say, I'm not amused.

He bit my bottom lip roughly, and I moaned out; he took advantage. I was his puppet, right now. I didn't care. It felt good, it felt right, and natural and- He was gone, and licking his lips with a satisfied smirk.

"You don't want me," Kenny suddenly said, rising. I watched him with wide eyes. What? "You need a nice guy, Kyle. I'm not the kind of person a sweet guy like you would want to date. I'm…rough." Suddenly, I was griping his pants to keep him from leaving. He looked down, a look of annoyance and contempt crossed his face. "Kyle…."

"I don't care! If you tell me you'll go out with me, I don't care! All I want is you!" I was on the verge of tears. "You can hit me, you can hurt me, you can do anything to me! But, I want you, Kenny. How can you kiss me then leave?" I whined like a prepubescent girl. How embarrassing.

That was when Kenny laughed, and pulled away. "That's what I meant when I said I wasn't a nice person. I would hurt you, Kyle. You're one of my best friends; I can't do that to you." then he walked back down the stairs whistling some song I didn't recognize. I sat there and cried like a stupid kid.

How could he do this?

X

"Wow." Stan said, stirring the icky spaghetti on his plate. We were eating at the Italian food place, and I had lost my appetite. "So, he kissed you, huh?" Stan asked, taking a sip from his soda cup. I nodded, and looked down at the food before me. Why did I get food when I knew I wasn't going to eat it? Stan put his fork in my salad and took a leaf. I allowed it.

His brow furrowed, "Don't let it get you down. Kenny's a player; he probably saved you a lot of sadness. Look at it this way: he could have broken your heart, but he didn't. He let you down nice and easy." I sighed. Stan didn't understand. He and Wendy were going on three years now, and still blissfully happy. He didn't understand…. Things were not that simple.

"But, Stan, you don't just kiss someone then say, Too bad! I don't dig guys and I might've given you a chance if you were not a friend." I said in one breath. Stan pursed his lips cutely. He sucked on his straw until the drink was gone, and he was calling the waitress for another. "You don't do that!" I said, feeling depressed once more.

"Did he really say it like that?"

"No. Not exactly."

"Maybe he was just toying with you. I can see him doing that. He likes to destroy pure souls such as yours, Kyle."

I gave a soft smile, "Thanks." Stan smiled widely and took another leaf from my salad and my garlic bread. "Pig." I joked grimly, and he stuck out his tongue. I couldn't suppress my small laugh. Stan had a way to lighten rooms, moods and anything that needed lighting up. That's just who he is. What would I ever do without him?

"Still, it has me so flustered, I can't concentrate!" I groaned, banging my head on the table. Stan patted me on the head and paid for both our meals graciously. As we were walking out he slung his arm over my shoulder and scooched in close.

"Kyle, if it is any consolation, ma petite ami, I would date you if I rolled that way."

"Gee," I groaned, "Thanks."

X

Restless sleep. Dreamless sleep. I tossed and turned unable to get comfortable. One position was too hot, the other too cold. Finally I just got up and put on my clothes; I called Stan and he told me I could come over. I knew where the key was.

As I trudge along the wide and lonesome streets I couldn't help but wonder if I would ever get over Kenny. I'd liked him since freshman year, would this love ever wane? God, I thought bitterly, I hope so. Suddenly, my cell phone started ringing. I leaped up surprised and picked it up, "Hello?" I said.

"What the hell're you doing out at two AM?" came an all too familiar voice. I stopped.

"Kenny?"

"Who else, dickweed? Get over here. Get out of the fucking cold!" he growled. That was when I realized… I was in front of Kenny's house, on the street. He could see me from his window, and I now saw him waving at me to come hither. I bit my lip and obeyed. He opened his window and told me to climb in.

I sat down on his bed as he locked the window and his door. "You dummy!" he barked, socking me on the head roughly. I glared; this wasn't where I wanted to be. "You shouldn't roam. It looks bad on your part."

"I would have been fine. I was on my way to Stan's."

"Huh."

"Can I go now? Why do I have to stay here?" I sounded bitter. But, I had a reason, and right now my brain was too filled to even care. As I rose, Kenny pulled me back down.

"Stay." he commanded.

"I'm not your mutt!" I said.

"Whatever. I'm not letting you leave. Call Stan. Tell him you're not coming. You can stay here." he said, tossing his crappy cell at me. I let it fall without even trying to catch it. "Damnit Kyle! Don't be such a pussy. Are you going to be a little girl now that I've dumped you?"

"You can't dump what you never have!" I spat venomously, and I saw hurt in Kenny's crystal eyes. I felt bad, but not really. "I'll be okay, but not until a few days. I mean, what you did hurt. You fucking teased me,"

"Tsk tsk. Cussing? Don't sully such a perfect mouth." Kenny growled, leaning against the door panel.

"I'm leaving," I said making my way to the window, but Kenny jumped on me, pinning me, on my stomach, to his bed. "Gerroff me!" I managed to squeal. He wouldn't budge. I managed to flip over so that he was straddling me, but I still couldn't move. I glared, but felt myself blush. "H-how do you expect me to get over you if you won't leave me alone?" I began to cry.

Kenny sighed and bent down to kiss my forehead tenderly. "Stop it," I sobbed, tears now dripping down my cheek. Didn't he realize what he was doing to me? How much this hurt? Anyone with half a brain could see that this was not a healthy habit…

He kissed my eyelids and then my chin then finally my lips, which quivered. I tried so hard to not let him make me melt… I failed. Once more I felt such serenity as he nibbled on my bottom lip and now ran his fingers through my hair. Kenny had such soft lips, and he was an expert with his mouth. My sobs turned to gasps and my tear disappeared as my cheeks burned red hot. When he pulled back he looked at me with fierce eyes.

"You better call Stan. It's late, he'll worry."

"R-right." I said as he got off me and left to get something to drink. I called Stan with shaking fingers. I told him I was at Kenny's, he told me to tell him about it tomorrow. "I will. See you first period, Stan. Bye." I said before hanging up. I fell back on Kenny's bed. I clutched his pillow to my chest and shut my eyes.

What now?

This was too much, I was going to explode. "Want to share the bed?" Kenny asked entering with two glasses of water. I sat up and drank mine to cool me down. Kenny sipped his elegantly. I blushed and shrugged. He looked down into his glass, thinking deeply. I watched him.

"I'll sleep on the floor, okay?" he finally said, and made a quick makeshift bed. I bundled up in his dirty covers and looked over the edge at him. His back was to me. I wanted to ask him so many things right now; but I couldn't. He would not acknowledge them. He would lie or tell the truth that would hurt me so deeply.

So, I rolled over, and I heard, softly and almost a whisper, "I could fall in love with you Kyle," before I fell asleep.

X

TBC. Thank you so much for the reviews! I love you all!


	3. Chapter III

I'm so sorry, my computer like died, and I lost everything

I'm so sorry, my computer like died, and I lost everything. Written from scratch; better than before! Review, thank you!

X

Previously: "I'll sleep on the floor, okay?" he finally said, and made a quick makeshift bed. I bundled up in his dirty covers and looked over the edge at him. His back was to me. I wanted to ask him so many things right now; but I couldn't. He would not acknowledge them. He would lie or tell the truth that would hurt me so deeply. So, I rolled over, and I heard, softly and almost a whisper, "I could fall in love with you Kyle," before I fell asleep.

Did I hear him right? I could fall in love with you, Kyle. Oh God. I tossed and turned all night. ALL NIGHT. Every time I shut my eyes I imagined Kenny's lip on mine. I imagined his torso atop mine, bodies clashing in the heat of passion. I saw myself staring so lovingly at him that I didn't care if the world ended right there. I saw Kenny smile, push back sweaty bangs, kiss down my face until his lips- his perfect lips- went to mine. He didn't have to say it, because I KNEW. His eyes said: I love you.

That's what I saw every time I shut my eyes. Torture behind my eyelids; I was so close to Kenny, I wanted to know what he meant. Why did he have to say that to me? "Kenny?" I whispered, glancing at the clock on my cell. It's 5 AM. So, he must be asleep by now. I whisper again, he groans, and turns to glare up at me with his piercing eyes.

"What?" he snaps, brushing back his shaggy bangs.

"Uh," oh my, I've lost my train of thought. "Uhm," I lick my lips, and he beckons me to come join him on the ground. "Sorry," I said, he shrugged, and sat up; I crouched on the ground, pillow clung to my chest.

He rummaged through his backpack for a cigarette. "Mind if I light up?" I shook my head. Of course I minded, but who I was to tell him what he could and could not do? He parked the cig between his lips, and lit it with ease. Smoke filled the room, and I coughed under my breath. "I was already up. Restless sleep, you know? So, don't apologize." I nodded, dumbly. Why was I so stupid around him? He leaned forward, took the glasses from my face while the smoke filed my nostrils and burnt.

Kenny put them on, and I blushed faintly in the moonlight. "So?"

"You look good," I growled.

"Duh," he said smirking, and handed them back to me. "Kyle?"

"Yes?" I answered too fast. He blinked his crystal eyes at me, and then put out his cigarette on his carpet, tossing the butt in some direction. I paid no attention. Everything around me melted, all the colors clashed together, but him. I was so fixed on him my heart began to beat. I was sure he could hear it; wasn't that how it worked?

"Why do you love me?" it was such a simple question. Kenny looked dead serious; I hoped he wouldn't try to fuck with my heart again. I couldn't take much more. Just being this close to him made me tingly. I mean… sure I'd been around Kenny plenty of times, but never had I felt such strong emotions for one person. I went through every reason in my head. I HAD done that every night up to the night I told him. But, at that point, nothing came to me.

My voice came out raspy, "P-pardon?"

"Why do you love me?" he asked again, leaning closer. I could smell the smoke; his shaggy hair covered his eyes. He made no effort to move it. I did, however, and he caught my wrist then roughly pulled me back atop him. I blushed. "Why do you love me, Kyle? Hm?" he said, snaking a hand behind my head. My glasses slid off, so everything blurred. I was lying on Kenny, our bodies were touching, and it felt like I might implode.

He brought my face closer to his, his lips lightly brushed across mine. Shivers danced through my body. Electricity pulsed in my veins. If he kissed me again, I knew I wouldn't want him to stop. "I-I have many reasons," I said as flatly at possible. He smiled, and gave me a quick peck on the lips. My lip twitched, he laughed lowly.

"Oh yeah?" he joked, kissing me again. Harder this time, longer. I savored the feel.

"Yeah," I said boldly, forgetting how he had used me.

"Tell me some of them." He ordered, I was obliged to obey. He kissed me for everyone I told him. The kisses were soft at first, then harder, then longer. Then he pried open my mouth, and I squirmed against him. He rolled over, and his tongue played with mine, it seemed.

"Tell me more," he ordered, moving his lips to my neck, and sucking on the skin. It was hard to think. His hands roamed down my clothes, lifting up my shirt. His ice-cold hands connected with warm bare flesh, and I bucked. He gasped aloud, and I felt as if I'd hit a nerve.

"You're amazing." He kissed my neck three times. "You make me smile, laugh. I can't help but blush when you get close to me."

"Mmmm," he mumbled into my neck, licking a trail to my ear. I shivered.

"Y-Y-you're so smart, but you don't try." I said with difficulty. He bit my ear, and sucked on it, making a guttural groan escape my mouth. I wanted to question him now. It seemed fair. I pushed him back He glared at me icily. "I want you to answer something for me."

"You don't want to do that. Just let me kiss you," he said, in his sultry voice. I almost caved in; my eyelids fluttered.

"N-No!" I whimpered. He faltered, and sat on my stomach.

"Fine," he said angrily, "Ask away."

"What did you mean?"

"By what?" he was getting impatient. I guess even Kenny, who gets more sex than anyone, gets impatient. Weren't challenges supposed to be fun? Wait. Was that all I was? I had to think positive; I didn't want to break down and cry, because I wanted Kenny to keep going. It was all I ever wanted. But, I wasn't going to be his doll… his fuck buddy he came to when he got bored.

"When you said you could love me."

"I meant just that." He said, and tried to kiss me again, but I pushed him back with all the strength I had. "FUCK KYLE. WHAT?!"

"Explain what you mean."

He sighed, ran his fingers through his hair, and furrowed his eyebrow. "I mean.. Fuck. Kyle, you are so nice. Everyone likes you at school; you may not be popular or hot, but everyone wants to be you. You have such a personality; you light up the room. You're a genius, but modest. A bit naïve, but…" he laughed. He licked his lips then continued, "A person like me could fall so fast for you," his eyes locked onto mine. I couldn't breathe. "I think I might be. But, I'm no good. A good boy like you deserves someone who won't get you in trouble, or fuck you up. You deserve so much better than me! But, since you came over, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. I thought, if I kissed you, I'd be fine. I would see you were nothing special, and that would be it. Move on."

Kenny paused to take a shuddering breath. I was in such a state of shock I almost blacked out. Were these words really coming out of Kenny's mouth? I half expected myself to wake up any moment.

"I couldn't. Kyle, you… Kissing you was different. I've kissed a lotta people," he chuckled, But you were different I'm such a douche; I shouldn't be doing this. We can't ever work out." He shook his head, and put his hands over his face in an exasperated manner. "You deserve someone-" I had to shut him up.

Before I really had any idea what I was doing, I was pulling him back down on me, pressing my lips to his, and using all the passion I had for him in that kiss. It was like fireworks; electricity coursed through my fingertips as I touched the back of his neck and his hand… He moaned as I ran my tongue on his lip. He gave in as I tried to give him everything I had.

I wanted him.

He wanted me. Right? "I think I love you, Kyle," he whispered. I blacked out.

X

God, this sucked. I'm so sorry. I just needed a filler. Review please. I'll keep writing. :B


	4. Chapter IV

I'm so sorry, my computer like died, and I lost everything

Thank you to those who reviewed. It meant a lot and really got me excited to write this.

X

Previously: I wanted him. He wanted me. Right? "I think I love you, Kyle," he whispered. I blacked out.

"Kyle! Oh, fuck me sideways!" Kenny? Is that you? I can't see him, but I can hear him. "Kyle? Jesus, wake up, man!" his voice is hectic, worried. And, I feel bad for worrying him; I feel like such a burden but my eyes won't open. I cannot seem to open my eyes. His calling becomes more fevered, until finally I can see his beautiful face twisted in agony. I blink a few times. He smiles, and I feel better instantly. "Jesus, Kyle. Don't scare me like that!" he breathes, and embraces me in a tight hug. It feels weird, but I couldn't care less.

I inhaled his scent, and let him clutch me tighter, until I nearly ran out of air. "I'm fine, Kenny. What happened?" I asked. He stared at me with azure eyes, searching my face for any signs that something was wrong. I smiled sadly, and brushed my fingers through my hair.

"You blacked out."

"Oh."

"Do you remember why?" he asked, biting his lip and taking his eyes from me. He searched his room with shaky hands for a smoke. He mumbled a few things to himself, and I just watched him light up a smoke and take two puffs, then put it out on his blankets.

"What happened?" I asked, cocking my head. Kenny stared at me blankly, and then gave me a sweet kiss on the lips. When he pulled away his hands remained on the sides of my face. "Kenny?" I said, keeping eye contact with him. He bit his lip; he put his forehead to mine and took a deep breath. "Do you love me?" I asked, and his body seized up. I felt bad; a little.

He nodded. "I think so."

"Then go out with me!" I urged, touching his face. He winced, pulled back. I wanted to kick myself.

"I can't," Kenny almost whimpered. It was so unlike Kenny to show any signs of faltering or weakness. Had I broken South Park High's bad boy? No. Probably not. "I'll cheat on you. I'm not good." I kissed him hard, and he pushed me away. "Stop it! Fuck, Kyle. Quit it!"

"I don't care, just go out with me. You won't regret it!" I begged, I pleaded, on my hands and knees. Tears filled my eyes, and I let them fall down my cheek. Kenny wiped them away with his thumb and kissed my cheeks. How could he be so sweet and say he didn't love me? Best friends didn't do this to one another; lovers did. That's all I wanted: a chance to prove to Kenny that I can be more than friends. That we could be lovers.

"Kyle…"

"Kenny. C'mon." I said, smiling sweetly. He furrowed his perfect brown, and his eyes searched my face for what seemed like the millionth time. Finally he smiled coyly.

"I'll go out with you. But, we have to have an open relationship. Okay?" I had no idea what an open relationship was… but it if meant being able to be with Kenny I was game. I agreed, and he kissed me everywhere he could with butterfly kisses. I hugged him and kissed him until the sun came up, and we had to go to school.

X

I learned what "open relationships" are. And, I wasn't too happy to say the least. For a week Kenny and I acted like a couple. I could see the envy in everyone's eyes as we walked down the hall hand in hand. I felt empowered. I felt so happy; nothing could touch me up on my little cloud where only Kenny and I existed. I spent nights at his house, because my mom didn't want anyone over. I told her I was Kenny's tutor, but he taught me a lot more than I taught him.

He told me I was amazing.

I told him I loved him.

Cheesy. But, I was satisfied, so I don't care much.

Then it happened. Monday the fourth. We were in English class, Kenny was in a deep conversation with Eric about drinking, and I was busy scratching notes down to keep my grade up. Stan elbowed me, and that caught my attention. As I looked up, the whole class went silent.

New students are a big deal at my school. With such a small population it can't be helped. We rarely got new girls; and this one, for lack of better word, was hot. Tall, and statuesque, with tanned skin and a Miss America smile… she was hot. Every guy began to salivate; I ignored her. I didn't have time to waste thinking about some girl; she may be nice, but I wasn't interested like everyone else was. I thought about going to Kenny's after school.

Miss America introduced herself as Shania. She was seated next to Kenny, who usually sat by Bebe who happened to be absent. I like to think Bebe is responsible for what happened next.

I ignored everyone until the bell rang, and we all went to lunch. Kenny was talking deeply with Shania, and I assumed he was being friendly. Grabbing my knapsack, I hurried over to him. "Kenny! Walk me to lunch?" he didn't smile at me, as he usually does. This time he glared daggers. I felt a twinge hit my heart. Shania smiled at me cattily, and I felt somewhat betrayed.

"Kyle, you've gone here how many years?"

"Four." I managed with difficulty.

"You can find you're way to the cafeteria, can't you?" he snapped, eyes flickering. Shania giggled, and I felt the blush rising in my cheeks. I nodded, and he smiled sexily. "Good! Now, I'll be there later. Miss Shania here doesn't know her way around. Can't just let her get lost. There's bad people in the world, right Kyle?" he got up and winked at me. I was at a loss for words as he linked arms with her and walked away.

Good thing I hadn't eaten anything… because otherwise I probably would have thrown it up.

X

TBC. Reviews are nice 3 And mucho appreciated.


	5. Chapter V

I'm so sorry, my computer like died, and I lost everything

I love you all. Here's another update. Might be the last one for a while. D: ENJOY. I made it EXTRA long and taudry.

X

Previously: "Good! Now, I'll be there later. Miss Shania here doesn't know her way around. Can't just let her get lost. There's bad people in the world, right Kyle?" he got up and winked at me. I was at a loss for words as he linked arms with her and walked away.

Good thing I hadn't eaten anything… because otherwise I probably would have thrown it up.

"Want some?" Stan Marsh, best friend and boy extraordinaire, held out the greasy fry to me. I sneered, and put my head back down on the lunch table. Stan was amazing; if I weren't so locked on Kenny he'd be my next choice; IF, and I dare you to look at chapter one, he "rolled that way". He was tall, statuesque, lean but not too thin. He has shaggy, short, black hair he hit under the same puffball hat, with wide blue eyes that mimicked the ocean. He had chiseled features, a devilish grin, and an amazing attitude for someone of his caliber. He was popular; even, maybe, more so than Kenny. I didn't understand his modesty.

"Nothing. I'm never eating again."

"Why, dude?" he asked, shoving a handful into his mouth. I looked at him with a horrified stare. He slowly chewed his food, and then licked the grease off his fingers. I gushed to him about Kenny's infidelity, and he nodded wisely, as he usually does. Stan is wise beyond his years. "Well, number one, it's YOUR fault for not specifying what type of relationship you wanted."

"I assumed he had eyes for only me."

"Kenny's a fucking rabbit, Kyle, he goes after anything that moves." I blushed and he continued. "Number two, you aren't doing anything assertive. Kenny likes the assertive type; take charge, Kyle. I know you're shy and meek, but seriously. You're a man. Grow some balls." He said almost bitterly, which stung pretty hard. He was just being honest, and I couldn't blame him because he was the only person I ever consulted. Stan smiled at me, his eyes crinkling, and ruffled my hair.

I smiled back warily, "Yeah, okay… What should I do?" I asked later as he and I walked home. We had study nights, Monday's and Wednesday's, where we switched between houses, and stayed the night studying. I had my hands shoved in my coat and my mind wandered to Kenny, and what he was doing. After school he'd kissed me on the forehead and told me he'd see me tomorrow. My mind went to the worst possible scenarios of what he could be doing.

I shivered; Stan offered his scarf. "For what?" he unlocked his front door, and we entered the somber Marsh residence. His parents didn't get home until eight, and Shelley was off in college. It was pretty awesome not having to worry about privacy or quiet time. Not at Stan's house. I slipped off my Vans and we leapt up the stairs for his room after we'd gotten snackage.

I plopped down on his mattress, and absorbed his scent. "Being more… you know, aggressive." He must have seen the blush. He nibbled on a piece of popcorn, and put the bowl down. He took his normal seat on the bed, and leaned up against the cold window. I watched him intently.

"You've never done anything dominant?"

"Kenny is usually dominant."

"Why?"

"I dunno," I answered honestly, feeling, oddly, like I had let Stan down. Was I supposed to be dominant? The thought had never occurred to me.

Stan smiled at me, and I felt shivers dance up and down my spine. Oh, no. What was he doing? My body froze, and I felt paralyzed. Stan crawled up to me, and roughly pushed me back down to his bed. My eyes widened. He straddled me, and my breath hitched. "You do this," he whispered, and started kissing me really hard. Kenny never kissed me like this; Kenny was sweet and tender…

Stan pressed himself into me; I couldn't move him no matter how hard I tried. He was too strong. He kissed hard down my jaw line to my neck, and I felt my body betraying me, because it felt so good. I stifled a moan; Stan let me hear his, as I arched my back. Then it hit me.

"S-stop!" his strength had relented, so I pushed on him. He glared, eyes mad, and fierce. I had never seen him look so vicious. It was… It made me melt! I gasped as he pushed me hard back to the bed, his grip tightening until my fingertips started tingling.

"Shut up." He said, right up against my lips. I couldn't speak, my mouth rolled open. "Got it?" he said once more, his lips caressing mine. I shivered, and nodded. He smiled, planted a soft kiss on my lips then got off. "That's all you have to do, Kyle. He'll be putty in your tiny, baby hands," he grabbed my hand to sit me up, but I fell right back down.

I was pretty positive I was the one who was putty.

X

Stan didn't seem to dwell at all on what he'd just done. We studied; I tried, and played video games until one o'clock and I passed out next to him on his bed. It seemed a little odd, I agree, to share a bed with Stan Marsh while I loved Kenny. Stan rolled over, his face too close to mine for comfort and blush made it's way across my face. I tiptoed out of his bed, and located my cell phone.

It wasn't that late… Surely, Kenny would be up? I hid in Stan's bathroom, locked the door and sat in the tub with the curtain blocking me. As if it helped? It rang two times then a very groggy sex god answered the line. I smiled hearing his voice. "Herro?" he murmured.

"Kenny!"

"Kyle? It's fucking late, kiddo. What do you want?" he pressed the phone too close to his mouth so that all his words slurred together. I didn't mind.

"How are you? I was just calling to see if tomorrow you wanted to-"

"Who's on the line?" came a voice that turned my veins to ice, and sent spider-like bumps all over my body. Shania?! What the fuck was she doing? She giggled and took the phone. Kenny opposed, and sternly told her no, but she'd already gotten a hold of it and was saying into the receiver,

"Kenny isn't in right now. He's too busy," insert giggle here, "Bye bye." Then click. The line went dead; my heart flat lined. I stared at my phone so hard I thought it would melt. No way. No fucking way. I was dreaming. Bad popcorn. Bad pizza. Bad…. FUCK.

X

"Stan?"

"Mer?"

"Wake up."

"No."

"Get up, Stanley!" I pushed him off the bed. He clattered in his blankets, looking like a burrito. He glared at me, and twisted his way from the coils of his comforter. Stan rubbed his wary eyes and tottered back to his bed, where he pulled me down with him. I squeaked as Stan squeezed me like so humanoid pillow. "Stan!" I said dangerously.

He groaned and death rolled to the floor. "Kyle! The sun isn't even up. Sleep. Now." He said, his face in the crook between my neck and shoulder. His warm breath tingled on my skin. I shook; he snickered. "Sleep is good for us. Creatures of the night," he mumbled, his lips brushing against my skin. If I had been standing up my knees would have melted.

"Stan, stop."

"Stop what?"

"Teasing me. I'm going to start calling you gay."

"I am very happy, thank you for noticing."

I glared, and he looked down at me, and then kissed my forehead. "I like you, Kyle."

"I like you too, Stan. BFF's. Duh." I said, trying to sound funny. But, Stan was solemn. His eyes looked my face over.

"No, Kyle."

My eyes widened. NO.

"I really like you."

I blacked out for the second time of my life.

X

What fresh hell did I come up with? I love drama. I'm so sorry. THIS IS DEFF KYLEKENNY so do not PANICK! D: GOT IT?! Okay. Cool. Reviews are loved. I love you all. See you soon.


	6. Chapter VI

I'm back. :3 I love angst. Let's get this ball rolling. Reviews are mucho appreciated, as always.

X

Previously: I glared, and he looked down at me, and then kissed my forehead. "I like you, Kyle." "I like you too, Stan. BFF's. Duh." I said, trying to sound funny. But, Stan was solemn. His eyes looked my face over "No, Kyle." My eyes widened. NO. "I really like you." I blacked out for the second time of my life.

My eyelids fluttered open. What was with me and blacking out lately? Could I even call myself a man anymore? Stan was hovering over me, with a pained look on his face. He touched my cheek, pulled back my bangs and felt my forehead. "You're burning up," he stated, biting his lip. His eyes wavered, never left my face. I sat up, and groaned. He didn't embrace me the way Kenny had when I first blacked out. Suddenly tears rushed to my eyes at the mere thought of Kenny. "K-kyle?" Stan asked inquisitively, his face too close to mine. I let out a sigh.

"I'm fine, Stan." I said, though I was not sure myself. Kenny was off with Shania, and Stan had just...Ohgod. My head spun, and I fell into Stan's chest. He tensed, and stroked my hair. His fingers undid tangles, and made me sleepy. "Stan, you have to be lying." I said in all seriousness. Stan chuckled, and I shivered. Stan was never one to be serious around me; but I could sense the change in his attitude now. It was solemn, serious, and refined. So unlike Kenny who was loud, blatant, and an overall jackass. Stan lifted my face with both hands, I was too weak to protest what came next.

I've learned that sometimes life is hard, and we must surrender. Even if it is against our better judgement. Stan kissed me again. Hard, passionate and long. His lips bruised mine, made them tingle with numbness. I fell back to the floor, once more, body melting as Stan pressed his chiseled body to mine, and his arms held my hands roughly above my head. I was sure he would bruise my wrists, but at that moment nothing mattered. If Kenny could be off galavanting with...HER..why could I not kiss my best friend?

The thought completely turned me off. I pushed Stan back, or as much as I could. "What is it?" he asked sternly. I licked my lips, and sighed.

"I can't do this, Stan."

"Why?"

"I love Kenny. And, he loves me..." the words felt heavy. Almost untrue at this point. Stan slammed his fist into his dresser. I jumped, frightened.

"He doesn't! He's cheating on you! What kind of a lover would abandon you like that? For a woman he barely knows? Do you think he even realizes how lucky he is to have you, Kyle?!" Stan's words hurt like hell, and I couldn't stop him. "Can you even begin to fathom how horribly he will break you? He will fuck your life up, Kyle. He will fuck you till you cannot move, then leave you like some forgotten child's play thing." Tears fell down my cheek. I couldn't take much more.

My heart was breaking. Stan grabbed my wrists, his eyes alive with passion. He pulled me to him, so I sat in his lap. His eyes shook as he pressed his lips to mine once more. "I can show you what love is, Kyle! You don't deserve to just be his little toy.." this last statement was in a whisper, and then he let go of my wrists. I wanted to move, but I was stuck. Stan was my best friend in the entire world; I knew he was looking out for my best interest, but this was the wrong way to go about it. He was becoming frusterated with me. I could not stop crying, or wishing Kenny was here.

"I can't stop loving him.."

"Fine," Stan snapped, and I sulked out of the room like a beaten dog.

X

I could not concentrate all day. School was in fast forward, and everyone in it was too. Kenny looked apathetically at me, but I didn't even look back, or say anything. I hustled to my next class, not waiting for him outside the door. Stan patted me on the back, and I knew we were okay for now. I smiled back at him best I could. "You look famished, Kyle," he stated as we went to lunch that day.I couldn't eat, and my eyes wandered the lunch room for Kenny. He appeared at our table, brow furrowed and looking a bit flustered.

"May I speak with you, Kyle?" he asked, shortly. I flinched at the tone of his voice.

"Y-yeah," I stammered, then grabbing me by the hand he dragged me to the restroom. Kenny made it so the door could not be opened, and suddenly picked me up nad placed me on the sink. I kept his hands around my waist in a tight embrace. I looked into his pure, crystal eyes. My heart was in my throat, it made it hard to swallow.

He leaned in and kissed me. It was sweet, and so Kenny. The taste of smoke, and the smell of his cheap cologne filled my nostrils, and alerted my senses. One of his strong hands went up my back gently, and tangled itself in my hair. I moaned, he smiled against my lips.

"God Kyle," he moaned. Hearing his voice, whispered against my skin, in this stolen moment... It drove me mad. My whole body was on fire from his touches. All my senses were sharpened, my brain was mush. Had he asked me my name, I would have drawn a blank. I was lost in this ecstasy when..

I pulled back, suddenly angry and all emotion zapped. "You were with Shania last night." It was a statement, not a question. And, apparently, one that caught Kenny off guard. His eyes flickered dangerously as he tried to come up with an answer. "Don't try to cover it up. I heard her.." Kenny let go of me and backed up, running his fingers through his blonde locks. "Why?" I asked, my voice so venemous that he could probably feel it.

"Nothing happened."

"Like hell! Don't lie to me." I was choking, nearly in tears. He stared at me.

"I told you we had an open relationship."

"I thought you loved me! Was everything a lie??" I was getting hysterical, but something in me would not let this cease.

"N-no, Kyle. I told you I would hurt you."

"So soon?" my voice shook.

Kenny bit his lip, and defiance was in his eyes. Did he see nothing wrong? His eyes became cold, and he chuckled lowly. "I told you. I FUCKING TOLD YOU KYLE! Don't you dare turn this on me. We had an agreement; open relationship. I can't always just focus on you, Kyle." he scoffed, and began to turn away like we were done. "Grow up, Kyle. Jesus." with that he left. If I had been more assertive it would not have ended there. Kenny McCormick would not have walked out. We would have kissed, and hugged and he would have said, I'm sorry I love you. But, no.

He just walked away.

X

I had to cry to someone, and that someone was Stan. Although I felt a tiny bit uncomfortable around Stan, he was the best shoulder I had to cry on. He understood my plights, and he was always there. I caught him before last period, and he told me I could come over again tonight if I needed to. A sweet gesture, but I was sure that if I spent the night we wouldn't just talk. Last period flittered by, Kenny didn't show up which did not surprise me. I sulked to the parking lot to meet Stan, then we would walk home. I sat down on the curb, and drew little figures in the snow.

So many things were on my mind. I saw a shadow, and turned. Shania was standing there, glaring at me. "Like, can I ask you something?" her voice irritated me. I take back what I said, she was not hot. She was a foul, disgusting, homewrecking whore. Hands on her hips, perfect lip glossed lips pursed in irritation she didn't wait for my answer, "Like, where's Kenny? I know you said something to him." I narrowed my eyes. Why would I help her? "I know your not dumb. C'mon. I haven't, like, got all day." she snapped, making me flinch.

"I don't know. We had a fight."

"Ugh. Gee, thanks. Now he won't be in the mood at all." she said, then clomped off in the opposite direction. I did the only thing I could think of: stuck my tongue out at her. Stan came out of the school soon after, breathless, and looking flustered. I didn't ask why at the moment, I didn't care. He sat down besideme, put a friendly arm around my shoulder and laid his head on my shoulder.

"People will think we're lovers," I said.

"M'kay." he cooed, and I could feel his smile. Why was Stan so queer sometimes, I thought but the smile would not be hidden. "Ready to go? My mom said it was alright again, I told her you were having school trouble," he bashfully said as we rose to go to his car. My fingertips were numb, and nothing was registering. Stan didn't try to make me talk. He couldn't. We sat in silence all the way to his house, then all the way up to his room. "Man, you look like someone died." he commented, shutting his door and locking it.

I mumbled incoherently as I plopped face first into his pillow. "Kenny and I had a fight. I called him out," I said softly. Stan sat on the edge of his bed, to give me space, while I rambled. I told him how Kenny had just walked away, and how torn I was, and about Shania's confrontation. Stan nodded, and didn't say much until I asked for his opinion. Slowly he crept upand laid beside me. His face was way too close. His breath was grazing my face, making me blush a little. This had never bothered me before, I thought. He closed his eyes and bit his lip before he spoke.

"I really don't think Kenny is right for you. I mean Kenny is our friend, dude, don't get me wrong. But, I will defend you before anyone else," this touched me, "He is going to tear you apart. He will apologize, and you will forgive him." I wanted to say something, but Stan interjected. "He will love you like no other, then the next time he hurts you, you will cry to me. I will help you- always- and then you will go back. Kyle, he will treat you like a puppet. His little plaything." I stopped him there.

"I know," I whispered.

Stan hissed, "Then why let him do it?"

"B-because all I want is a chance."

"You think you can reform a bad boy like Kenny? You have another thing coming to you," Stan's words were more than venemous. I flinched, every word was like pins and needles. He was right, I wanted to reform Kenny. Deep inside I wanted to make him all mine, but Kenny was an uncontrollable beast. Still, I couldn't give up. Giving up was not a posibility. And Kenny was worth everything, I thought. Stan couldn't realize that, and that meant he never would. Stan looked frusterated as I gave a small smile. He groaned, putting his face in his palm. "You'll really go to Kenny, over me?" I bit my lip, and looked , he rolled over, so his back was to me, and wished me luck.

I smiled, and hugged him. His heartbeat sped up. Stan Marsh was the single greatest person on Earth. "You know how much you mean to me, Stan," I said into his back, and inhaled his scent deeply. He sighed, "Yeah." He turned, kissed my forehead then announced he was hungry and left. I was about to get up when I heard a tapping on Stan's window. Outside was a flustered looking Kenny McCormack, rage flaring in his eyes, and his lips pursed tightly like he couldn't beleive what he had seen..

"K-kenny!" I said, and he scoffed and turned to leave. Shit. I had to run after him, hopefully Stan would understand.

X

TA DA I SUCKKKKKKKKKKKK.


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